On Me

Friendships

Just a few years ago, I was constantly sending messages to friends and planning events so I could fill every moment with friends. I believe this behavior stemmed from me being a loner most of my life, and I got a taste of what it was like to be very social. I wanted to constantly be surrounded by people, even though this is mentally exhausting for introverts like myself. What even made it more exhausting that in many cases, I was the only one initiating our get-togethers or communication

So I experimented by letting the foot off the pedal and see who was willing to also put in the effort for our friendship. It turned out not many. Despite all my efforts, I was still that same kid that was picked last to play on a team. I guess I’m just not the best at socializing, and pretending anything different is disingenuous. This week alone, I was given three examples of how friends behave towards me. The first, I sent a text to see how they were doing, and I got a polite response but no further conversation. The second, I received a text asking how I was doing and then proceeded to ask for a favor. The third was checking in on me because they had not heard from me in a while. We ended up talking on the phone for over an hour and making lunch plans.

Today, I am grateful for those people that want to be a part of my life and accept me and those around me for who we are.

Categories: On Me